(no subject)
Jul. 17th, 2003 04:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hyurifinally got all the stuff to fix my DDR pad, spent a couple hours getting all the leads down, soldering the connections, putting the damned thuing back together again -- and the up, right, and start buttons don't work. some of the PCB traces get severed somehow. so I need a new controller to cannibalize. and I'm broke because I spent my last 5 bucks on a copy of Shadows of the Empire. oops.
anyway, this all, along with the burns from the soldering iron, caused me to seriously flip out for some reason. I tried to attack my brother; nearly took my mom's head off verbally because I was resisting the simultaneous urges to kill someone, curl up into a ball and disappear, and cry like a baby. she got a phone call, and I took off out the door and swiftly undertook to achieve the latter two goals. I spent an unknown amount of time around the side of the house curled in a ball incoherently sobbing, nose dripping and mouth drooling. I kept trying to stop, to say something to Rubi or Saba when they walked by, but I couldn't.
anyway, I finally managed to stop, wiped my face and blew my nose, and next thing I know I'm sitting on a street corner a couple of miles away. stiff, logy like I just wake up and I was sleeping sitting up (which I apparently was), and relatively clear-headed. as in, I decided to go back home without getting hysterical; however, it took me almost an hour to do so, by which time I was definitely pretty loopy again. needless to say, this perturbs me greatly.
...
in other news, one of my father's high school buddies' girlfriend wants to hook me up with her 17 year old daughter. what I'm wondering is, what the hell did this girl do to deserve having me inflicted on her? and alternately, what the hell makes her think this girl could possibly be interested in me? I'm a slob; lazy as all get-out; a nocturnal creeper of the 'net; unfriendly and antisocial; self-absorbed; and my mind is dark with evil thoughts, in both the "good" and "bad" senses..
anyway, this all, along with the burns from the soldering iron, caused me to seriously flip out for some reason. I tried to attack my brother; nearly took my mom's head off verbally because I was resisting the simultaneous urges to kill someone, curl up into a ball and disappear, and cry like a baby. she got a phone call, and I took off out the door and swiftly undertook to achieve the latter two goals. I spent an unknown amount of time around the side of the house curled in a ball incoherently sobbing, nose dripping and mouth drooling. I kept trying to stop, to say something to Rubi or Saba when they walked by, but I couldn't.
anyway, I finally managed to stop, wiped my face and blew my nose, and next thing I know I'm sitting on a street corner a couple of miles away. stiff, logy like I just wake up and I was sleeping sitting up (which I apparently was), and relatively clear-headed. as in, I decided to go back home without getting hysterical; however, it took me almost an hour to do so, by which time I was definitely pretty loopy again. needless to say, this perturbs me greatly.
...
in other news, one of my father's high school buddies' girlfriend wants to hook me up with her 17 year old daughter. what I'm wondering is, what the hell did this girl do to deserve having me inflicted on her? and alternately, what the hell makes her think this girl could possibly be interested in me? I'm a slob; lazy as all get-out; a nocturnal creeper of the 'net; unfriendly and antisocial; self-absorbed; and my mind is dark with evil thoughts, in both the "good" and "bad" senses..