it doesn’t mean what you think it does

[hyuri]

it’s been less than a month. it feels like most of my life. why can’t I stop; get away from the cause? I suppose it has been, in a way: it’s just an extension of past...

pictures don’t bother me. descriptions, stories of causes—they bother me. strong emotions bother me. I bother me.

I know what changed. I stopped being able to distance myself by focusing on a book, or a game, or a difficult problem. I lost the ability to hide from myself.

mood swings, I know. believe me, I know them.